I am sitting here a bit dumbfounded.
One of my close male friends just called to "break-up" with me. Except the only problem with this is that him and I have NEVER had a romantic interest in each other, and we also have never had any significant personality conflicts. His reason for not wanting to be my friend anymore? His girlfriend is not comfortable with our friendship. Wow.
I can understand why a woman would be uncomfortable with her man having close female friends(although I personally do not agree with this mentality), but seriously I am about as threatening to my friends' relationships as a stuffed Spongebob Squarepants doll. What especially stinks about this is that this individual has been someone I've been with for about the last decade--we've laughed together, cried together and seen each other's lives change drastically.
I've always enjoyed the friendships I have had with my male classmates or colleagues, but I can't help but wonder that if these types of connections are impractical as we grow older and spouses and significant others play a greater role in our lives? Does anybody have thoughts on this?
What can I say? I wish him luck.
One of my close male friends just called to "break-up" with me. Except the only problem with this is that him and I have NEVER had a romantic interest in each other, and we also have never had any significant personality conflicts. His reason for not wanting to be my friend anymore? His girlfriend is not comfortable with our friendship. Wow.
I can understand why a woman would be uncomfortable with her man having close female friends(although I personally do not agree with this mentality), but seriously I am about as threatening to my friends' relationships as a stuffed Spongebob Squarepants doll. What especially stinks about this is that this individual has been someone I've been with for about the last decade--we've laughed together, cried together and seen each other's lives change drastically.
I've always enjoyed the friendships I have had with my male classmates or colleagues, but I can't help but wonder that if these types of connections are impractical as we grow older and spouses and significant others play a greater role in our lives? Does anybody have thoughts on this?
What can I say? I wish him luck.
Do you guys hang out a lot in person, or just talk on the phone? Also, is this his choice as well, or only his gf's?
ReplyDeleteI feel unless there is evidence that anything but friendship is taking place, there shouldn't be any need for this. And it seems unfair she is controlling his friendships.
Maybe you can talk to the gf, since it seems to be her issue.
If you can't really say anything to him/her to fix it, and you hope to keep the friendship up for the future, you could say "thanks for the 10 years of friendship; sorry it had to end this way. just know i'll always be here for you as a friend."
or if you just want to let the friendship run its course (i.e. just end now), you can say "thanks for the 10 years of friendship. hope life treats you well."
Hey Betty,
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for your feedback and support. I'm actually not big on talking on the phone, at all. So, the only person I will talk to on the phone is my mother. If we communicate, it's via text and I only saw him maybe once every month--it wasn't frequent at all, and we only ever hung out in very public places. I was also always careful to invite his girlfriend, although she rarely joined us. I can't help but feel that this is his girlfriend's choice, but he didn't clarify that with me and I didn't ask.
We'll see what happens... :-(
you are awesome, and they're both missing out!!!
ReplyDelete